If you are short of toilet paper ...

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If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Lophophaps » Fri 06 Mar, 2020 6:40 am

... try eBay
https://www.ebay.com.au/sch/i.html?_fro ... r&_sacat=0
Prices range from $1 (a sheet) to $1200-10,000 for a packet of rolls of varying sizes.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Son of a Beach » Fri 06 Mar, 2020 7:40 am

huh... for 99 cents you can even get some "pre-owned" toilet paper, condition: Used

https://www.ebay.com.au/itm/Toilet-Pape ... Sw8zNeYLCm

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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Lamont » Fri 06 Mar, 2020 7:49 am

Need some baddd. Will even take Black and gold. Asking for a friend.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby wildwanderer » Fri 06 Mar, 2020 8:07 am

the scary thing is people are buying this stuff...

ebay 48 rolls of 2ply sandpaper for the 'bargain price' of $60. 240 sold including 6 in the last 24 hours... :lol:
https://www.ebay.com.au/itm/Toilet-Pape ... Sw76lcLe7y

Get 3 ply from coles for $16.

If you run out just use soap and the shower... it aint rocket science.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Gadgetgeek » Fri 06 Mar, 2020 1:20 pm

Some of those ebay jokes are funny, but not funny enough for me to risk my rating or my paypal account! Some of those auctions have to be set-ups. Also, pretty sure an 8-roll doesn't fit in the small pre-paid satchel. So much for profiteering.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby tastrax » Fri 06 Mar, 2020 1:32 pm

Lots of jokers on Gumtree as well

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Cheers - Phil

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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Lophophaps » Fri 06 Mar, 2020 2:56 pm

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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Moondog55 » Thu 12 Mar, 2020 9:00 pm

Lamont wrote:Need some baddd. Will even take Black and gold. Asking for a friend.

How many tents is a 6 pack of Quilton 3-ply worth then?
If we run out here we will simply cut old toweling into small squares, use them damp and then simply compost them, my compost heaps reach 80C and perfectly safe
Ve are too soon old und too late schmart
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Huntsman247 » Thu 12 Mar, 2020 10:27 pm

Moondog55 wrote:
Lamont wrote:Need some baddd. Will even take Black and gold. Asking for a friend.

How many tents is a 6 pack of Quilton 3-ply worth then?
If we run out here we will simply cut old toweling into small squares, use them damp and then simply compost them, my compost heaps reach 80C and perfectly safe
Depends on whether you have diarrhoea or Corona virus. The toilet paper exchange rate is probably higher with the latter.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Lamont » Sat 14 Mar, 2020 11:07 am

Had a dream last night.

Going to get in the car leaving the supermarket
a man sidles up and says- "you chasin'?
'No I'm not" I say.
He says "c'mon I've got the best you can get, Mt Gambier 4 ply",
I just have to look,
turns out to be Sorbent 2 ply doubled over and I woke.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Moondog55 » Mon 16 Mar, 2020 1:35 pm

It's not toilet paper I am worried about. Safeway locally have had a huge run on Tim-Tams and Teddy Bear bikkies and chockolate of all descriptions. I have some small bars stashed so I'm alright because Cecile doesn't like peanut bars and I have quite a few of those. If I am stuck in the house I am going to need lots of comfort food and popcorn Whoops better buy popcorn tomorrow and extra butter and salt
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby crollsurf » Mon 16 Mar, 2020 7:35 pm

Can't wait to show off the Smart Water bottle bidet hack to the family in coming weeks. Wifey will not be impressed. LOL. Your call darll

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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Lophophaps » Mon 16 Mar, 2020 8:56 pm

A solution.
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I've been slowly buying a little more than usual, and now have a month of food, including Tim Tams, bought on special. As the Grand Prix was cancelled, a lot of food from the event was going to be wasted. The Salvos are distributing gourmet meals to the needy, probably including the homeless. Nice.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Ms_Mudd » Tue 17 Mar, 2020 3:58 pm

My tried and tested 'clean finish' method utilised when walking is already in play here- we are getting low on TP and no underground connections to get any more.
Take zinc cream (nappy rash cream) or antichafe cream for cycling, smear around poop chute exit point, no need to go crazy and cover anything other than the exit. BM as planned..et voila- world's easiest clean up.
I discovered this hack while changing babies nappies in special care nursery at work, so much easier and far fewer wipes with the babes that had a bit of nappy rash cream on. I started employing it on my walks as I could then carry less TP and could walk faster as my cheeks glided ;-)
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Moondog55 » Tue 17 Mar, 2020 5:14 pm

OK Why didn't you post this BEFORE I went to the chemist?
Your timing sucks
But a word to the wise for people with aches and pains, don't mix up the nappy cream and the deep heat.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Neo » Tue 17 Mar, 2020 9:56 pm

I don't suffer blisters but do get a bit of butt cheek chaff! No more as i will now ligtly lube the buttocks:)
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Lamont » Wed 18 Mar, 2020 3:36 pm

Ms_Mudd wrote:My tried and tested 'clean finish' method utilised when walking is already in play here- we are getting low on TP and no underground connections to get any more.
Take zinc cream (nappy rash cream) or antichafe cream for cycling, smear around poop chute exit point, no need to go crazy and cover anything other than the exit. BM as planned..et voila- world's easiest clean up.
I discovered this hack while changing babies nappies in special care nursery at work, so much easier and far fewer wipes with the babes that had a bit of nappy rash cream on. I started employing it on my walks as I could then carry less TP and could walk faster as my cheeks glided ;-)

Genius.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby crollsurf » Fri 20 Mar, 2020 2:32 pm

This is what the country folk have been doing for ages when they run out of dunny paper
https://www.facebook.com/kathy.higgins.961/videos/10213346724701172
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Lamont » Fri 20 Mar, 2020 3:12 pm

Sorry Crolly -too scared to look.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Lophophaps » Fri 20 Mar, 2020 4:09 pm

A few more suggestions have been made. Ask for a statement at an ATM. Bunnings have sandpaper. Magazines printed on 90 gsm glossy art paper are not useful unless one reads them. Murdoch press newspapers are fine, but save the sudoko.
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Huntsman247 » Fri 20 Mar, 2020 7:59 pm

crollsurf wrote:This is what the country folk have been doing for ages when they run out of dunny paper
https://www.facebook.com/kathy.higgins.961/videos/10213346724701172
I took a young lad out for his first overnighter last year and showed him & his family that trick when helping him with what to pack. For some reason even before convid-19 they wouldn't shake my hand anymore. [FACE WITH TEARS OF JOY]
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Re: If you are short of toilet paper ...

Postby Ms_Mudd » Thu 26 Mar, 2020 7:27 pm

Nice tip from the country gent ;-) Thanks Crollsurf.

I am glad that some other forum users might try my nappy cream tip, nothing like a totally clean finish. I did use one of my cycling antichafe creams in the last few days as it was within reach, it was a brand with tea tree in it, imagine it would be a bit softer than the Deep Heat though still packed a punch, Moondog!
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